Dating a Man With Kids


It’s possible that dating a man with kids is one of the most complicated things to deal with in a relationship. But it can also be one of the most gratifying and amazing accomplishments.

dos donts dating a man with kids Dating a Man With Kids   What You MUST Know FIRST

There’s a lot to be interested in. After all if you don’t have kids of your own, you might like the idea of taking on the nurturing maternal role, even if it’s not for your own children.

And, knowing that he’s made this kind of commitment himself is also a big plus. It shows that he’s capable of devoting himself to family, the way you need to know he will.

However, you do need to know all the details about it so you can make a good decision.

Is Dating A Man With A Child Worth It?

A lot of this will depend on whether or not you’re used to having kids around. If you have your own kids, you’ll probably already know the answer to this.

If you don’t have kids of your own, you are going to have to make some adjustments. It’s a big deal to take on kids that are not your own.

There’s no way anybody can tell you whether it’s worth it or not. The best they can tell you is what to be aware of going into this kind of relationship.

Pros & Cons Of Dating A Man With Kids

The PROS:

  • If he’s looking for a relationship, he’s not going to waste time or energy
  • He’s going to have an open heart if he’s open to loving his child
  • He’s not going to be in a hurry to get married or rush the romance
  • He’s going to understand commitment on a very deep level

The CONS:

  • His life is going to be chaotic, and you’re going to have to be really flexible
  • You’re going to have to figure out your place along the way – and fit in a way that helps the kids first, him second, and sometimes you last
  • You gotta deal with his ex – so hopefully they’re on good terms
  • You’re going to have to work around a time schedule (and dating schedule) that won’t be carefree – it can be hectic.

There might be many more that you will figure out on your own, given your situation.

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Here are a few of the reasons why you would want to immediately walk away from a relationship with a man with kids:

  • You don’t want kids (this is an IMMEDIATE deal-breaker and you should walk away now)
  • You’re not ready to share the parenting with another woman (his ex)
  • You’re either too young for kids or too old for more kids (basically you don’t want kids yet)
  • He’s not up-front and honest about his parental situation and role
  • He doesn’t seem to be able to balance that dad role with making you happy and being a good man for you
  • If you want biological children of your own in addition to the kids he has, he has to be on board with that.
    (This might sound strange, but you should make sure he hasn’t had a vasectomy. A lot of guys get them when they’re done with making babies, but he didn’t realize the marriage wouldn’t last.)

I would think most of those reasons make sense to you if you think about them.

Is there baggage with a relationship like this?

Of course there are complications. I have been a man dating several single moms in the past, and I can completely relate to the complication of this situation.

It may not be easy, but nothing worth doing in life will be easy – as you know.

dating men with kids dos and donts Dating a Man With Kids   What You MUST Know FIRST

You also have to realize there are plenty of people ready and willing to give you advice. Some of it’s good, but some of it is bad. Like, really bad.

And the bad advice could easily wreck your relationship!  So you need to know the truth.

For example, one of the most emotionally charged objections goes like this:

“You don’t want to raise another person’s kids!”

This particular objection depends on your perspective. If you are a woman who could not have children for some reason, or you wanted to add more children to your family, you might adopt a child.

Technically, this would be raising another person’s kids. And this would be a good thing –  especially if it were a child from an underprivileged part of the world.

But “not raising another person’s kids” is still not a good reason to avoid dating a man with kids.

dating relationship advice dating men with children Dating a Man With Kids   What You MUST Know FIRST

Of course the title “Stepmom” isn’t one you may have set out to acquire. We all have our “fairy tale” visions of what our ideal relationship and marriage would be.

When you grow up and become a real adult, you understand that those ideas aren’t always the way things work out. And this also doesn’t mean that the relationship you wind up with is any less valid or “magical.”

It’s up to you to make the meaning for yourself and embrace your path!

So let’s dig into some of the tips you need to know if you’re going to date a man with kids…

Before we get started though, I want to clarify my terminology:

In this article, I will call a traditional relationship where you are the biological mother of the kids a “traditional relationship.”  This is not to say it is abnormal or weird to have something else. It’s simply not what we were brought up to think of as a “normal” relationship.

TIP #1:  You have to have good self confidence

If you’re going to date a man who has kids, you have to understand that at some point you’re not going to be his priority. This would happen even in a “traditional” relationship.

You will be a priority, but maybe not always his number one. And as long as his kids are your priority, you’ll always be on the same page. You can’t let this feeling of being slighted diminish the strength of your relationship.

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If I’m being completely truthful –  and I always am when it comes to relationship advice – a man can feel pushed to the side in a traditional relationship.

I’ll confess that I had these exact same concerns as a young man – that my wife would lose interest in me for the kids. I knew that children are a HUGE priority for women. AND that this can sometimes be an excuse to shift your focus when you have relationship struggles.

Unfortunately a lot of marriages never bounce back. The children become the Battleground for a marriage that just won’t recover.

And it’s not because it can’t, it’s because the parent(s) won’t.

TIP #2: If you thought it was hard meeting the parents….

Here’s the situation…

His children are now probably part time with him. And while it’s probably more difficult on their mom, they now have to share him with you. And deal with a broken family.

pros cons dating a man has children Dating a Man With Kids   What You MUST Know FIRST

This ain’t going to be easy.

BUT it can be done.

As long as you keep their situation in your thoughts and heart, you’ll be able to navigate the difficulties with them a lot better. It’s those women that become adversaries and try to force their way into his life that will find themselves struggling quite a bit.

Meeting his actual parents might be a walk in the park. Of course depending on what his parents thought of his ex and how it all turned out.

His ex could also turn out to be a HUGE bag of crazy, and you have to figure out how to deal with that.

TIP #3:  Holiday Hell

Here’s another little bit of reality for you:  When it comes to certain celebrations, holidays, special events, you got to keep in mind that SHE will be a part of them.

Yes –  the other mom will inevitably be at some of these events. And you may have to even be there with her family, depending on the nature of the get-together.

(Hey, I did tell you upfront that it was going to be a little complicated, right?)

You need to be prepared to interact with some of the people from his old life. It may not be comfortable, it may not be fun, but you have to accept it as part of the deal.

TIP #4: The Paycheck Won’t Come For A While

Perhaps one of the most tricky Parts about this kind of relationship is that you will be doing all the work of a mom, but maybe not getting all the credit.

Depending on the age of the kids, you might find yourself doing a lot of mothering right off the bat. Assuming that the kids take to you fairly well, you’ll be doing all the household stuff and mothering stuff with only him to provide appreciation.

And honestly, he may fall down on that appreciation himself quite a bit. Let’s face it, he probably learned that he wasn’t getting enough appreciation in the last marriage. It’s a frequent problem in relationships. Especially for men.

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So you have to ask yourself if you’re ready to do a very big crash course in becoming an Instant Mom without necessarily getting all the trophies and awards.

Well, who am I kidding, you’re not going to get any awards. But you do get the satisfaction of raising these kids as best you can. Perhaps even better than she did.

TIP #5:  You have every right to request your compensation

What I’m getting at here is that you should make it clear when you don’t feel appreciated in your new role. There’s no reason you should go completely without credit.

There’s nothing wrong with having a conversation with him and letting him know that you rely on him for positive strokes for taking on this role. In fact, I would recommend you bring this to his attention.

He may not see past his own struggles, and he might not realize what kind of responsibility it puts on him and you.

Obviously you don’t want to sound demanding, but there’s nothing wrong with letting him know if you don’t feel appreciated. He needs to see what your situation is like.

He won’t receive the same things you do because he may not see them. He needs you to explain that every so often.

TIP #6: When it comes to HER, let him handle it

There are some tricky boundaries in a relationship like this. You are going to be navigating some uncharted waters for sure.

dating advice for women dating men with children Dating a Man With Kids   What You MUST Know FIRST

When it comes to issues between him and his ex-girlfriend or ex-wife, aka the children’s mom, you have to step back and let that be. It’s tempting to get involved and to manage him in those situations. But you have to sit back and provide feedback when he asks for it.

You don’t want to appear to be interfering or manipulating. That will only make it more difficult for him, you, the kids.

TIP #7: Watch out for comparisons

You may be tempted to compare your situation with another woman in a similar situation. But the truth of the matter is, both of your situations are going to be very different. Similar on some, but different most of the time.

Keep that in mind as you deal with the weirdness that can come up.

What I’m referring to is of course the comparing of someone else’s more ideal or “easier” situation to your own circumstances. Each is going to have its own difficulties.

Comparison only makes us more unhappy. (If you spend any time on Facebook, you know what I mean about this.)

TIP #8: Don’t forget about the money

One of the uncomfortable truths is that if he’s paying any amount of child support or marital support to his ex, it’s going to put him in a difficult situation.

tips advice for women dating man with kids Dating a Man With Kids   What You MUST Know FIRST

5 out of 6 custodial parents are women, meaning that the man was most likely not the primary caretaker for the kids. Which means he’s probably being held accountable for money to support her and the kids in some way.

The average cost of child support in 2013 was around $500/ month. His payments might be way higher than this.

So he may also be paying off that lawyer who didn’t do much to get him custody, either. His financial situation could really suck.

I even have a good friend who spent over 6 years and $2,000,000 in court contesting his wife’s divorce demands.

But just be aware that money might be a point of contention in your relationship.

TIP #9: Beware of those expectations

The same as comparisons, you have to watch out for your own expectations. If you have some idea about how your relationship should be, or even your eventual marriage, you have to modify that now.

Your situation will be a little different than everybody else’s.

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And if you have a preconceived notion of how it should be, you will always be running into those expectations. And trust me when I tell you that expectations usually don’t win over reality.

Let go of all expectations and just play it as your personal game to win for yourself. Life will seem so much easier when you don’t have to live up to some false constraint.

TIP #10: You may have to be a little better than the rest

Honestly, in order to handle a situation where you’re coming in as a new parent, possibly even with your own kids, you may have to step up and really shine.

Dating a man with kids requires you to have your life together.

  • You got to be confident
  • You’ve got to be sharp and on your game
  • You got to be able to get real and dig into the dirt when you need to.

TIP #11: You better get moving!

Another of the harsh realities of dating a man with kids is that he’s not going to wait around for you. If you aren’t sure or aren’t ready to move forward, he’s probably going to lose interest pretty quickly.

He’s going to need to know if you’re in or out fairly soon, because he doesn’t have time to waste.

If you think it’s hard dating as a single person, you should try it as a single parent.

But wait – there’s one more TIP you should know about:

BONUS TIP: No BS!

Look if a guy has gotten to this point in his life where he has been married and had kids, or just had the kids, he’s had to face a lot of harsh realities about being a guy.

And being in a relationship.

The simple truth is he’s not going to want a lot of complication, drama, or head games in his relationship. He’s going to want things relatively smooth and waveless.

advice for woman dating men that have kids Dating a Man With Kids   What You MUST Know FIRST

That means that the relationship you have with him is going to be fairly chill. As in, you’ll probably spend a lot of time just chilling out, having fun, and enjoying the every-day with him.

To the degree that you can just be there for him and support him and maintain a real relationship – as in low maintenance – you’ll probably do really well with him.

But again, it does take a certain amount of self-discipline and having your stuff together.

This game isn’t for the faint of heart. Many women come into it thinking that she can just sail in – but not realize just how complicated and trying it can be.

That being said, you will also experience something very rare if you do it right. You can make a difference in a way that their biological mom might not be able to.

You have the opportunity to really make a difference to them, and to their father.

It’s a unique role.

And no, it’s not for everybody. But if you do it well, you’ll not only be admired by others, admired by his kids, admired by him, and you will truly find your own self-respect and self-worth.

If you’re ready to get him to make this kind of commitment to you, you need to know what men really think about long term relationships…

And how he’s secretly wishing he had one.

Whether he has kids or not, men want a long term, committed relationship.

That probably sounds a little crazy to you, and I wouldn’t blame you for thinking that.

However, it’s true. Men WANT committed relationships.

But most women don’t know this – or how The Cupid Effect works to make him desire you – and commit to you.

Go find out more here…

cupid effect Dating a Man With Kids   What You MUST Know FIRST

How To Use A Conversation Piece to Jumpstart Your Social Life


con·ver·sa·tion

[ kònvər sáysh’n ]

  1. casual talk: an informal talk with somebody, especially about opinions, ideas, feelings, or everyday matters
  2. talking: the activity of talking to somebody informally
  3. informal talk about issue: an informal talk about something involving representatives from various interested groups

Have you ever noticed that some people, no matter where they are, can start a conversation with anybody? It can be at the supermarket, a party, or in line at the post office. No matter what the situation, they can start a conversation easily and effectively with any stranger while you stand by with envy and confusion, wondering what their secret is.

I’m going to reveal their secret and the benefits of learning their secret so that you can enhance your social life far beyond anything you’ve ever imagined.

Unique objects are what get attention

Many of you think that starting conversations is extremely hard and that it takes special skills that only a few people possess. These are misconceptions that you created in that little brain of yours that are keeping you from truly learning the art of conversation that is practiced so well by those people you envy.

Every great conversation starts with something unique about the way you look or an object that you have, even before you open your mouth. Think about this for a second and recall a time when you noticed a person walk into a room over everyone else. Even though the person who caught your eye in that instance might not have been the best-looking person in the room, for some reason he or she lit up the room upon entering it, and neither you nor anyone else present could take your eyes off that person no matter how hard you tried. It’s as if nobody else in the room existed anymore, and as soon as that one person got settled in, everybody flocked around him or her like flies. Yet, with all of this chaos and excitement, you still couldn’t pinpoint exactly why this person got so much attention while you seemed to have to fight to get even a little, or just resigned yourself to none.

Don’t look desperate for attention

Getting attention requires being unique and having your own look – and there’s no better way to do this than by having an item that nobody else in the room has. This is very easy to do, so long as you know how to do it.

If you don’t do it right, it can have the opposite effect of what you set out to accomplish, and chase people away, instead. For example, you could walk in wearing a bright-colored rooster suit or a bright orange hat that’s eight feet tall, but people would think you’re just a goofball who’s looking of attention. When you look desperate for attention, people think that you’re not that popular and, therefore, not that interesting – because otherwise, you wouldn’t need to scream for attention by wearing such outlandish garbage.

You want to draw people in by being tasteful, and not looking as if you are trying too hard to be the center of attention.

Types of objects that get the right kind of attention

I first discovered this technique a few years ago when I broke my favorite pair of sunglasses and needed to replace them so that the glare of the sun wouldn’t hit my eyes as I drove down the road. Now, I could have just walked into a gas station and bought a cheap pair – but being a sunglasses fanatic, no ordinary pair would just do. They had to not only protect my eyes, but also be different from what everybody else is wearing, because I love having my own unique style. In my search for the perfect pair of sunglasses, I happened to stumble upon a brand called Black Flys.

As soon as I started wearing the new sunglasses, the compliments started rolling in faster than tires at an auto store. Everyone wanted to talk to me. I was constantly told that I’m cool and that I look like a movie star. One guy told me that I had this Miami Vice-type smoothness and he could envision me appearing in a weekly television series as the main character. Starting conversations with people was a breeze, just from wearing a simple item such as sunglasses.

Another time I had to replace my wallet. The one I had didn’t have enough pockets, and I didn’t want to buy a leather one because they are boring and over-priced. Again, I wanted something that would reflect my own personal style, rather than having the same thing that everyone else had. The magical moment happened one day when I was in one of my favorite stores browsing around. On a rack were these awesome-looking wallets called Tyvek that are made out of this funky waterproof and tear-resistant material. They had amazing graphics on them such as Beavis and Butthead, Star Trek and various comic book heroes.

At first, I wasn’t aware of how desirable these wallets were, but found out soon enough. The same thing that made me notice them made other people take notice, too. Whenever I pull the wallet out to pay for anything, whether at the restaurant or the grocery store, both men and women say they love it. They ask where I bought it, and to my surprise, some were already familiar with the company that makes them, Mighty Wallets. Even my dad had to buy one after seeing it.

Why do these items start great conversation?

Unlike items that scream for attention and make you look foolish, these items have a useful function. Everybody needs sunglasses and wallets. Having ones that look out of the ordinary make it look like you have your own cool and unique style. When people see this, they figure that you have to also be a very interesting person to talk to. They already have an image of what you’re like even before you open your mouth and say your first word – and this benefits you. Little would you suspect that the conversation has already started non-verbally, and everybody can’t wait to talk to you.

The same effect can be achieved with items other than sunglasses and wallets. Funky-looking or brightly-colored sneakers worn with regular neutral-colored clothes or a suit can really cause you to stand out. An oversized watch like the Joe Rodeo watch I picked up in Manhattan, New York can definitely cause a few necks to get whiplash. Basically, accessories that ordinary, everyday people wear but that have an unusual twist to them can lead to conversations that you once thought were impossible to open with ease, and will cause everybody around you who doesn’t know this social secret to stare with envy.

What did we learn about unique Conversation Pieces?

    • Create your own unique look by getting an accessory that nobody else has.
    • You want to draw people in by being tasteful – not by looking like you are trying too hard to be the center of attention.
    • Wear items that regular, everyday people wear but that have an unusual twist to them.

How Blogging Gurus Feed You B.S.


How does a man become successful?

There are many different ways that a man’s success is measured by today’s society. Some are considered successful if they make millions of dollars. Others are considered successful if they gain financial freedom by leaving Corporate America yet still manage to take care of their family. The latter is the type of success that I think is the most important for a man to strive to achieve, and here’s why.

Money can buy you all types of material possessions. Sixty-inch flat panel televisions. High-wattage entertainment systems. And luxury cars, such as a $100,000 Mercedes Benz. Of course, working toward this materialism comes at a high price. It takes time away from your family, requiring you to work over 70 hours a week and miss family functions, not attend your children’s graduations or school events, not spend time with your lovely wife, and not getting any personal time. In other words, it can subtract from your quality of life and ruin the happiness in your home. You have to work many stressful hours in order to pay for all this junk, or otherwise, the bill collectors will come knocking your doors down in the middle of the night and drag you out by your toes.

So how do you go about achieving the type of success that I mentioned?

Forget just seeking a niche; help others with what you know

Many people will tell you to start a business by finding a niche and then marketing it to the right people. At first this seems like great advice. In my experience, it’s the lousiest advice I’ve ever heard. It’s like telling someone who wants to learn how to golf to just go out to the greens and practice until they find the proper way to position their body and swing the club.

Instead, do as I do, and help others with what you know. Anyone who really wants to learn a certain thing, regardless of what it is, will find a person who has experience in what they want to learn and knows how to teach it. My areas of expertise are fitness, business and social improvement skills. Instead of looking for a hot money-maker and the fastest growing niche, I went with what I was good at so that I could provide some real useful information that would actually help people, and earn income while helping and doing something I enjoy.

Don’t believe the books, so-called gurus and wish pamphlets

So-called gurus are usually the ones who will write a book with a flashy title, such as “How To Start A Successful Home-based Business” and “How To Blog Your Way To Over $4o,ooo Per Month. ” They all promise you the secret to making truckloads of money overnight while working only a few hours a week, which I say is complete B.S.

Now don’t get me wrong when I say B.S., because I’m what you call the biggest fan of doing business over the internet, and I do think that blogging can make you a modest income if done right. It’s just that many of these bloggers who say they are making all this money per month are completely full of it. Instead of actually telling you how to make money, they will tell you convincing stories of how they went from zero to sixty in growing and turning their blog into a real money machine virtually overnight.

One blogger who is famous due to his scummy self-promotions is a perfect example of the type of B.S. that I’m talking about. Every day this blogger writes a post or has a guest post promoting some type of affiliate program or list-building service that promises more traffic and income to your blog. At first, it seems awful nice of him to be putting so much time and effort into offering you all this amazing free advice so that you can have the same financially successful life he does. Here’s what he doesn’t tell you, though. He gets a nice little bonus for each person who signs up. Every month, while you’re making pennies on the dollar, he’s getting kickbacks from the affiliate money you earn. He knows that you will get frustrated when you realize that you won’t get even close to the amount that he promises…so what does he do?

Simply creates videos bragging about the places where he eats and how fancy his car is. This is to give you false hope, just like the old Amway reps used to do in order to get you to buy their business opportunity and get into their multi-level marketing scams. Amway would have little home-based parties designed to convince a bunch of poor souls who were looking for a way out of their lousy jobs or unemployment to buy the rights to sell their inferior products. They’d feed off your desperation by seducing you with a booklet of photos that showed people sailing on million dollar yachts, living in skyscraper-sized mansions and driving fancy cars so you’d believe you had a chance of owning the same luxuries. Meanwhile, they’d do nothing but take your money. This blogger uses the same tactic that these Amway representatives did, with one difference.

Instead of having home parties, these so-called gurus have huge seminars where they say there will be other gurus whom you can’t miss listening since they have all the answers you’ve been looking for. Hundreds of people will show up, paying large amounts for the tickets just to hear this rehashed information. Some gurus will even offer you free tickets just to get you there, because then the guru can pretend to be your friend and sell you all kinds of programs and false promises down the road, which end up costing you hundreds of dollars.

These get-rich-quick blogging gurus never tell you that they don’t earn most of their cash by blogging. Instead, the money for their fancy cars comes from giving a bunch of nonsense seminars, selling hyped up affiliate programs and courses, selling e-books with rehashed information, and showing wish books with rich people.

The internet has allowed these guys to advertise these events online now on a global scale, reaching far more poor souls than ever before. And, unlike Amway, they don’t have to sell you tapes, books and other materials in print anymore. Now they can just show videos online, sell e-books and drive cars right on their websites.

How to really make money online

Before you can make any money online, it’s important that you have a realistic mindset of what it really takes to make it in any type of business. You have to look at starting a blog as you would any other business.

    • Consider what you are good at, and be able to teach others in a way that they can understand. If you genuinely help people solve problems, people will see that you’re knowledgeable about what you teach and come to you for help. By finding random niches just because they are a fast growing segment of the market, you may not know much about it and will need to learn from scratch. People want experts when they are learning, so it could greatly impact your business when people find out that you’re just starting out in the field.
    • Put your readers first by giving them useful information instead of putting out crappy articles, something that I see all the time. Many bloggers will post every day in order to increase traffic and have people click on their affiliate link so they can earn income – but the quality of your articles suffer, so this strategy only works until people start to see through you. Instead, give people great information and put some effort into creating it so that you can build up a solid reputation that will give you longevity in the business.

Peacocking Or Image Building? | Loveawake.com blog


The first time I heard this term, it was while reading about the pick-up-community. Peacocking is the act of wearing something completely different and often times ridiculous in order to stand out from the crowd. At first, I thought that this was just a joke – until I noticed that whenever I wore something very unique and different, I’d get many compliments from both men and women and asked where I got it from. Two examples of this is my watch from New York City and wallet from Mighty Wallets. Both of these items get plenty of attention without screaming “look at me” and without looking ridiculous.

Peacocking when done right is the equivalent of a company trying to build an image towards its consumers. Like the dating world, launching new products is very competitive. There’s only one difference. You’re not just trying to sell a product (you); you’re looking for something much more sacred. To get close to a woman. Get to know her better. And eventually get intimate. In order to do this, you want to project the right image so that she’ll consider you more than just a potential mate. Many men get past her defenses and become a potential mate. The problem is that they never become more than that. Why is that? There are a couple of reasons why this happens to men and they end up going home to cry themselves to sleep.

They look like a circus clown

Imagine going to meet a financial investor only to be greeted by a guy that looks like he just came from the circus. Would you trust him with your life savings? Of course not! Now imagine meeting a woman while wearing woman’s pants and a see through mesh shirt. She’s not going to consider you a possible mate because she’s going to think you’re immature. Not the image to project to any woman you’re trying to date.

Lack of Identity

Many guys will dress up in outlandish outfits without considering what kind of image they are projecting. It’s important to dress in a way that you’re comfortable with in order to not constantly worry about what others are thinking of you. Everything from your pants, shoes, shirts and accessories such as watches should match the type of person that you are. This way you’re not constantly distracted, thinking about them rather than focusing on socializing.

High quality and style rules

I was once visiting a friend who worked in a bar to grab a bite to eat while there. Everybody was dressed in worn out t-shirts, jeans and sneakers. This guy walked in wearing a classy suit, dress shirt, flashy tie and shoes. Everybody instantly noticed him, and because he acted cool, had no problem with socializing. And he did this without dressing like a fool.

Accessories are great peacocking tools

If you’re anything like me, you are not the type to wear a suit everywhere you go. Now I’m not saying you should dress like a bum, because clean, good quality clothes can go a long way. Unique watches, wallets and sneakers can all make you stand out without looking like you’re trying to get attention. In fact, they can make you look like the cool guy that has a laid back and fun personality.

When it comes to peacocking, more is not always better, and can make you look like a well-respected guy that everyone wants to talk to, including women.

Is She Just Too Complex For A Man To Get? Just A Nag?


There is a tremendous pay-off to continuing the “story” that women are mysterious. Both men and women benefit from this excuse. This justification alleviates both men and women from having to take responsibility for their own differences – even at the expense of diminishing women, as they are labeled at best “mysterious” and at worst “flakey, air-head nut-jobs.”

Power Productions Corp.

The Issue

Him: In your mind, you’re telling yourself that there’s no way you’re ever going to understand this uncontrollable, over-emotional, uncaring nut-job, because women are more mysterious and confusing than the Bermuda Triangle. You wonder if she’s deliberately trying to make you feel bad about yourself with this nagging. Maybe she just enjoys conflict. When she starts going in on you, you try to smooth the situation over by staying silent, maintaining a deceptively calm exterior, or taking complete blame and apologizing profusely even though you’re not sure what you did wrong, and aren’t sure if you even care at this point. All you want is for her to cool off and for the storm to blow over. You feel so frustrated. You love her, and this is why it pains you that she seems to want to make you feel small, and to breach the peace. Doesn’t she care that you had a really stressful day at work? All you know is that you’re starting to resent her deeply and to slowly drift away from her.

Her: Your woman is telling herself that you’re a jerk or an asshole who selfishly cares only about your own needs and comfort. It seems like you aren’t even listening to her, since she has spoken to you about this particular issue repeatedly to no avail. She is convinced that you don’t care enough to try to understand her feelings and meet her needs. She feels alone and abandoned, like a voice crying out unheard in the wilderness. She thinks her emotional turmoil is proof that she cares about the relationship, and your seemingly calm indifference proves that you aren’t at all emotionally invested in the relationship and are unmoved by her frustration, confusion and sadness over it. She wonders if you even love her enough to want her to be happy. She loves you so much, so that’s why your apparent indifference wounds her so deeply. She tries to ignore her building frustration and confusion, but it becomes impossible to hold back and she bursts like a dam. She sounds harsher than she intended, but at this point, she just wants to know that you feel something, anything. After the argument has been either averted or fought and ended, you still don’t do anything about the original issue, and her frustrating cycle – trying not to nag while suffering silently about her unmet need – starts all over again. All she knows is that she resents you and is slowly drifting away from you.

You both feel as if you just can’t connect, and don’t know how much longer this can go on. It’s as if a giant gulf has opened between you, and as much as you each want to, you can’t close the divide or cross it to reach to your partner. You doubt your partner genuinely wants to reach you, anyway. It feels like the most frustrating thing in the world.

Why This Happens

Most men do want to communicate and to be a good boyfriend or husband.

The trouble is that most men are taught as boys to hold most of their emotions inside. Boys who express any feelings besides anger, aggression and ambitiousness are teased by adults and other kids, who tell them they’re big babies, sissies, or acting like girls. Boys live in fear of this shaming growing up.

Instead of practicing communicating, boys are told to go play football or play war with toy guns. Boys are also told to just leave the girls alone, since boys are bigger and stronger and taught how to be rough, and girls don’t play the same way. When guys get older, many of us still follow the respectful rule to be gentle with women. Since we love our woman, we don’t want to fight with her. When a woman starts expressing any displeasure or frustration or getting mad, we see it as bad since we only associated this with anger and hate. That is because while growing up, other men never showed their feelings unless they were mad and wanted to fight us. We think she hates us and don’t know how to handle it because we’re taught not to argue or fight with women out of respect.

Whenever men think about sharing or discussing feelings, we hear the little mocking voices in our head saying she won’t understand, or will ridicule us and say we’re unmanly. When we do attempt to say how we feel, we often say things wrong or offend, even though we don’t mean to, because we’re not good at this type of communication due to lack of experience.

Women grow up communicating in a judge-free environment; they practice displaying their feelings and talking about how they feel to their mothers, sisters and best friends without being laughed at. They also receive more emotional support while growing up. With all of this social practice, many women can more easily spot when another person is upset or sad over something, and how to get them to talk about it. Since many guys don’t spend time learning how to observe these things growing up, many of us don’t know what cues to look for to see how the other person is feeling. Women and men have the same emotions, but men learn to suppress them a lot more and not learn to understand what these things mean when they feel them, until their own feelings are basically foreign to them. No man will admit that he’s socially awkward and doesn’t know how to communicate, because of the fear of exposing himself to public ridicule from nearly everyone.

What Men Can Do

Women’s biggest complaint is that their partners or husbands don’t understand them and seem emotionally unavailable. Most women want the sort of guy who will open up to her and share his feelings and problems with her, and understand what she is going through and support her when she’s low. By opening up to her and telling her how you feel and how much you care for her, the two of you will have a much closer relationship, and your woman will appreciate the fact that you cared for her enough to overcome this enormous obstacle.

Do not assume that you know better than her what she needs and how her needs should be met just because you’re a man and think you’re far more rational and therefore superior. Logic and emotions are equally important and neither of these things can be denied without creating a fractured, unfulfilled human being and a fractured, dysfunctional relationship.

Never date a woman who bashes you for communicating your feelings or trying to understand hers. Also, just as there are some men who would like to believe they have a complete monopoly on being logical and understanding logic, there are some women who would like to believe they have a natural monopoly on understanding and communicating emotions, and would not like to see that change by allowing men to grow. You shouldn’t get involved with women like this, because they are denying you a part of your humanity.

How Women Can Help

Men want to feel that at least there is at least one person in the world who they can relax and really open up to sometimes without feeling judged. They are wearing a mask with everyone else in the world because they have to, and don’t want to always have to be on guard with you, too.

You can help your man by encouraging open and honest communication. You may start by telling him that you don’t understand his behavior and you want to, but don’t want to make him feel uncomfortable. Always listen respectfully to his perspective. Never get judgmental or defensive, or dismiss his viewpoint or feelings as invalid. Your perspective may be completely different than his, but being a woman does not make your viewpoint more valid than his. Do share your differing viewpoint with him afterward so that each of you can see where the other is coming from and arrive at a mutual understanding.

Avoid accusatory language. Never mock him as being unmanly for opening up, or he will completely lose trust in you and shut down again, and never open up to you for a long time, if ever. It’s never a good idea to tell men how they feel, because men take it as a personal attack. It makes a man feel like you’re assuming instead of trying to understand him, and that you don’t want to understand.

Of course, not all men will be willing to work with you to build a deeper connection, so you need to be sure that the man you select for a relationship is one you can talk to, who cares enough to listen, and can empathize with your needs and is making the effort to learn how to grow in this area.

Growing Closer is a Team Effort

Romantic relationships, especially marriages, are supposed to be about mutual support. In order to be supportive, you both need to be able to be good listeners and good communicators. Men and women are different, but not so different that a man and woman can’t ever hope to understand each other. If you put in the effort, you will be able to understand each other and forge a deeper bond. Remember that declaring women “too mysterious” or men “emotionally shallow assholes” is a cop-out.

Bahumbug To The Whiny Men


Dear whiny men,

There was a time that I used to feel bad for you and could understand why you felt sad and lonely. I know how painful it can be when the holidays roll around and you feel left out when everybody shows up with their significant others. You feel like you get up every morning and go to a dead-end job – even though you could do better than the people running it, if you were only given a chance. All your friends aren’t around when you are down and out, and your family couldn’t care less about you.

It’s as if the whole world is against you and there’s nobody there to tell you that everything is going to be alright. The women out there are superficial and only want good-looking guys with money. Your employer is greedy and only interested in using your amazing talents to make money without giving you credit for keeping the company from closing for all these years. And your family doesn’t appreciate you because they are jealous of your potential to take over the world. You’re angry and upset because you deserve better than what you’re getting and won’t stop until you get what you deserve.

Does this sound like someone you know, or is it you?

Well I have a message to all you whiny men who feel this way, because as far as I’m concerned I have no sympathy for the anger and resentment that you are holding inside towards others. I see men like you complaining on different websites created by dating gurus who tell you that it’s not your fault. Society has beaten you up. Women don’t understand you and don’t give you the sex that you’re entitled to. I’ve heard it all and I don’t buy it.

I get complaints everyday from men just like you, and I’m going to give you a few examples of some men who are too lazy to do anything about their life, and choose instead to complain.

Here’s one from one of my favorite complainers named Dave.

Ms. Mimi – Thanks for your honesty (if in fact you are really a female)/I wish that more women had your attitude since so many of them could learn from you.
If I get a young lady out for coffee ( I pay) , it is because she asked me , and showed that she was interested in me. It is absolutely NOT worth my precious time
to approach, and I think that your own experience has shown you why men have to think this way. Women think it is the man’s “JOB” , i already have a job.

I’ve been through this discussion a thousand times and am not going to address it again. Instead, I’m going to give a bit of harsh but well-deserved advice to you, Dave. This website is not about helping women improve themselves, even though it never hurts if they do. It’s about helping men improve their social skills, because in all honesty most men need it more. They are so afraid to take a chance to get what they want, including a date with a gorgeous woman, that they’d rather stay single before they swallow their pride and admit that they need help with their social skills.

Women aren’t afraid to admit that they want a man, and have even shown it on here by commenting and asking for help more than the guys whom this site was made for. The reality of life is that we need others to succeed in life and can’t do everything on our own, including overcoming social problems. I have spent a lot of time obtaining the best information from different experts and even women to give you a different perspective from others so that you can realize what your problems are and attempt to correct them. And for the ones who need help, I have offered help numerous times, so there’s no excuse as to why you’re complaining about what women are like or how bad your lives are.

I have always recommended that you don’t waste time on the women who are not compatible for you or have social issues that no man in his right mind would ever tolerate. Women are just like us. They are human and are no more perfect than we are. All you have to do when you meet a woman who seems to lack the qualities that you are looking for is walk away. There’s no law saying you have to date her under all circumstances. The problem is that you’re desperate because you’ve been alone for so long since no woman wants you.

This is all your fault because you refuse to change. Put yourself in the shoes of your prospective date for a second. Would you date a woman who wears messy, stained, or dirty clothes that haven’t been washed in weeks? How about if she didn’t shave or shower? Or didn’t take care of herself by not exercising? And how about if she had bad table manners or was embarrassing by the way she acted when meeting your friends? You guys expect a lot, but ask yourself what you’re offering in order to get a woman to date you. Why would a woman date you if you’re too lazy to put the work in to show that you’ll take the relationship serious? Does it seem fair that women have to be fit, dress and smell nice, get bikini waxes and be friendly, while you have a grumpy attitude and look like a sewer dweller?

Well according to John there’s another reason.

Whatever. Women do want the “bad boys” and will always go for a man who mistreats and abuses them. I’ve seen it so many times in the past 20 years. Any man who has a shred of decency will always be rejected by a woman, but they will do anything to get with the thug in the room, even after he beats the cr@p out of them.

Women simply do not want good men anymore. They’ve been conditioned by society that they have to accept the scum because that is the only type of person who can make their lives interesting. Yeah, till he beats you to death as happened to several women I went to high school and college with.

I’ve heard this complaint a thousand times and am tired of hearing it. The reason why many women go for the so-called bad guy is not that they like to be abused and beat up. It’s because they are the only ones who will not only approach women but also ask them out. They don’t stumble over their feet as soon as a woman walks into the room. Women like attention just like we men do, and feel the same about excitement.

Many so-called nice guys are afraid to show women their interest because they are either afraid the women will reject them and destroy what little confidence they may have left, or get offended because you’re somehow doing something wrong as if you’re a little boy. When will you guys wake up and realize that women are just as afraid of being rejected as you are? In fact, it’s worse because if a guy rejects her in front of others then there has to be something terribly wrong with her since, according to myth, any woman can get a man into bed.

Another problem is that women can ruin their reputation a lot faster and easier than a man can. When a woman is seen asking men out, people automatically assume she’s desperate, or that she’s easy and will call her a slut. Once this happens, she will have this reputation for the rest of her life and have a harder time finding good quality men to date. This is why women don’t ask men out.

The so-called bad boys who know about this swoop in and take the women away while you innocent so-called good boys sit on the sidelines wishing it were you. This causes you to get angry and resent women, because you feel like you’re entitled to what the so-called bad boys are getting. Lot’s of sex from women throwing themselves at you!

When all this doesn’t happen, you seek out websites where you can complain and blame everybody for what you are too afraid and lazy to go out and get for yourself. Do you think you can get a job without looking? Buy a house without looking? Make money without working for it? Like anything else in life, you don’t get anything for free. You have to go out and work and take what you want, or nobody else is going to give it to you. And this applies to dating also.

The women aren’t going to come knocking on your door and form a line down to the end of the street just to meet the incredible you. So here’s what I have to say to you whiny men. Bahumbug!

Unlike other sites where I see men and the pathetic dating experts talking about women and calling them names, I happen to respect and like women, actually. There’s nothing like the feel and beauty of a woman who you love. If you don’t like and respect women like you should any other human being, you’re not welcome here and can go somewhere else and whine like a baby. I’m not a baby sitter and not about to waste my time changing your diaper and feeding you a baby bottle.

So if you want help, don’t hesitate to subscribe and leave a comment below. And make sure that you share with others. Otherwise Bahumbug to you. Stop worrying about what is wrong with women, but rather how you can become a better you.

How NOT to Go to Your Grave a Virgin


I know an 81-year-old man who has a deep, dark secret.

For a long time, I’ve known by the way he talks, acts, and presents himself to others that this man was very unique and different from most guys. Don’t get me wrong – he’s a decent guy who tries to get along with others in a respectful and polite manner.

The problem is he’s very awkward when trying to socialize with other people, especially women. Sometimes, he unknowingly says things that make women think he’s creepy or just plain desperate to talk to anybody who will listen. And maybe they’re right. It would be understandable, seeing as he lives all alone with talk radio as his only companion, is on a fixed income, can only get around if his bills are paid and he has enough to rent a car, has never been married…and shockingly, is a virgin.

Most people would laugh and ridicule this man if they discovered that he is a virgin, like in the movie The 40 Year Old Virgin. In that movie, Andy Stitzer (Steve Carell) is a lonely 40-year old virgin who has no social life except for watching Survivor with his elderly neighbors who live upstairs. Guys like this, especially in the extreme case of the 81-year-old, are mocked horribly because many assume that the only virgins are acne-popping high school teens who live in their parents’ basement. Of course, reality paints a much more pitiful picture. Virgins come in many different ages, many being over 40, and even your once-in-a-lifetime 81-year-old.

The cause of the ridicule is that it’s not just assumed all guys are having sex; it’s expected. Whenever a guy goes to any social gathering, whether a family picnic, friend’s birthday party or a group gathering among co-workers, the first things people ask him are, “Wheres your girlfriend? Are you single? Why aren’t you dating? When are you getting married?” They get bombarded by more questions than a criminal in an interrogation room with Dirty Harry.

If his answers imply that he’s not currently seeing a woman, then everyone assumes he’s either gay or not telling the truth. They think there must be something wrong with this guy, because there’s no possible way a man could be over 18 and still a virgin.

First come the mockery and jokes from his fellow guy friends, making the already lonely and depressed guy feel smaller than an ant. Next comes the assault of bad dating advice you often hear circulating around dating circles like gospel. Some will say, “Just ask a lot of questions when talking to a women.” Others will say, “Be mysterious or give lots of compliments,” assuming this will make her desire you like a mountain lion drooling over a t-bone steak. Then comes the more complicated advice, such as mentioning something fun you’re going to do over the weekend, dropping the subject and talking about something else so it will have time to soak into her brain, then bringing it up again later and asking her to join you when you go. Of course, you can always go with the most simplest and common advice and “just be yourself” – but we all know how that usually ends up. Unless you eliminate all your bad habits first, this is basically dating suicide.

These poor confused, lonely guys not only get tons of pressure from friends and family to have sex, but the media also bombards them with the image that they should be able to get sex easily on a daily basis. Watch a movie and there’s always a scene with a man and woman hooking up and having sex. Go into the magazine aisle sometime, and you will see thousands of magazine covers featuring scantily clad women, suggesting that these men go out and find a woman right now to have sex with. If only it were that simple.

The problem is that first, not all of these men want to have casual sex, and second, even if they did, these magazines never tell them how to go out and meet a women and eventually end up with a date. Some men want a relationship with a special woman they feel a deep and meaningful connection with, rather than just empty, meaningless sex. But since most magazines feature articles by so-called-experts that only write about theories instead of actually practicing social building skills, the advice is usually as useless as trying to fight a tank with a squirt gun.

So what usually happens to these socially awkward, confused men? A lot give up altogether, not knowing where to begin. They accept it as their fate, even while miserable inside, rusting away like an old car in a junkyard. Others will get extremely desperate and try the current dating gimmicks that charge thousands of dollars to attend, much the same way unemployed, broke people do with get-rich-quick schemes. These over-hyped programs or boot camps market to these very desperate, lonely guys who will do anything for a date. Society beats them down for being single until they are willing to do anything in the hopes of being happy, even pay every penny they possess.

If you’re one of these lonely, dateless guys I have a little secret to tell you that many of these boot camps or programs wont teach you. The only way to get good at talking to women is to hone these skills:

  • Talk to as many people as possible The more people you talk to in as many different social situations as you can, the better you will get at adapting to your environment, which will make you a much better conversationalist.
  • Update your sense of fashion The way you dress is what gives people their first impression about you and determines how they are going to perceive you.
  • Build your confidence Women find confidence to be the sexiest thing a man can have.
  • Keep your attitude positive Nobody likes to be around a miserable, negative person, so keep a positive attitude.
  • Treat women with respect Many coaches will tell you to use gimmicks such as ignoring women, using magic tricks or insults. These may get you temporary success, but will never really help you improve your social skills. Improve yourself from the inside out, and you won’t need such creepy gimmicks.

While this list isn’t extensive, it does provide some of the most important aspects of your life that will need some major improvements before you will be able to actually go out and socially wow groups of people and women alike. This will take tons of practice and patience to master, no matter what the so-called experts who want to charge you thousands of dollars to learn a few magic tricks and opening lines will tell you. You can either go out and practice until you learn the necessary social skills, or you can go to an overpriced boot camp only to find out later that you will still have to go out and learn how to socialize. It will just cost you $7,000 less. It’s your choice, so good luck.

A Cave Man’s Way To Attract Women


Hey CaveMan. We all know you’re responsible for inventing the wheel, discovering fire and teaching other guys how to bash women on the head with a club. You deserve credit for all those accomplishments – but when it comes to attracting women, we need to talk.

Yes, we all know that an old Geico commercials they say, “It’s so easy a CaveMan can do it,” and that it’s very humorous and entertaining to watch. Unfortunately for you, my hairy fellar, when you do it, it’s not so funny and entertaining.

The only way you’d actually be able to get a date would be to bash them on the head with your trusty old club. The problem is that things have changed quite a bit since you were hunting Wooly Mammoths. Today, instead of giving women massive migraines, men use social skills to attract the opposite sex.

Let’s start with the way you look and dress, Mr CaveMan. While it’s very true that clothes can make a major change in the way a man looks, it doesn’t do you any good if your body posture is all wrong. We all know that Caveman hunch forward and drag their knuckles on the ground while they walk, but when it comes to attracting the opposite sex, it’s all wrong.

Whenever you enter any type of venue looking for a date, your body language has a much stronger message than your words ever will.

  • Pull those shoulders back, CaveMan – but don’t look stiff and unnatural. Look relaxed and confident.
  • Lift your head up high. It’s been proven that women find men who lift their head up a bit more attractive than men who tilt their head downward. And keep your head straight; don’t tilt it to the side.
  • Be sure to smile. You want to look like the friendly CaveMan who’s having fun and is approachable. CaveMan can have fun too you know. Plus everybody wants to be around the fun person. Fun is like a virus – anybody can catch it.
  • Make good eye contact when talking to women so that they view you as having confidence and being trustworthy. CaveMen who look away even for a second or fidget are seen as insecure or thinking about something else, such as sewing a new pair of Saber-toothed Tiger Boots.

Now that we’ve corrected your bad CaveMan posture, let’s work on the way you dress. Women put a lot of time and effort into their appearance. They go get manicures, pedicures, get their hair done and keep their clothes very clean and neat. Women expect a man to look decent when they are going out places with him. A sloppily-dressed man is one of the biggest complaints women have. Women view men who dress sloppy as not taking much pride in themselves, and assume if they date them they won’t take much pride in the relationship either.

Here are a few tips to follow:

  • Go through your closet and throw away any clothes that are too big or don’t fit properly. Any shirts that have drooping collars or sleeves should be donated or trashed.
  • Make sure you wear pants that don’t droop or fall down showing your underwear. Straight leg is the most versatile and is always in style. Make sure you buy a good selection ranging from light to dark colors. Don’t buy any pants with holes, wear marks or any emblems on them unless you’re a 14 year old girl.
  • Any clothes with rips or stains should be thrown into the garbage.
  • Only wear shoes that are clean without wear marks. Shoes are the first thing that a woman sees when a guy walks into a room.
  • Buy clothes that are fashionable, but that will be in style for a long time.
  • Buy unique accessories and shoes that show your unique style and identity.

Some guys deliberately wear extremely outrageous clothes to draw attention and get women to start conversations with them. Items such as fury boas, cheesy jewelry and blonde dyed hair will definitely get you attention. But will it attract the type of attention that you truly want?

Every guy should show his awesome fashion sense by the way he dresses. But it should always be done in a way that makes you look fashionable and also masculine at the same time. Clothes can tell a lot about a person and can either make a great first impression – or an everlasting one that leaves a sour taste in all the mouths of the women you meet. You only get one chance at making your first impression a good one, so don’t blow it by dressing like a clown, CaveMan, because clowns only get laughed at.

Growing up, many CaveMen didn’t spend nearly as much time socializing as young Cavegirls did. While young Cavegirls were sitting around the cave sewing, starting fires to cook and talking about men, CaveMen were out playing sports, wrestling and getting into mischief. Young Cavegirls have alot more practice at socializing than CaveMan, because they’ve been practicing their whole life.

You and your buddies have a lot of catching up to do, so the sooner you start practicing the better. At first it’s going to be very tough to be more social and to make a connection when talking to women, but after a while you will start noticing little things the same way women seem to be extremely good at doing.

There are many books available on how to improve social skills and how to meet women, but many are completely useless. They come from the authors’ perspective and experience, and therefore most likely will not match your personality and lifestyle. Instead of using one of the exact same made up, memorized scripts that so many other guys are using word-for-word to try to start conversations, why not use something that’s real in your life instead? Here’s an example:

Memorized Script: I have a quick question for you guys. I can only stay a minute because I have to get back to my buddies, but you look smart and maybe you can help me with this: Who lies more, men or women?

Real question: Hey, I noticed that you ladies are wearing stewardess outfits, and figured you’d know quite a bit about travel. My buddies and I are going to Las Vegas, and wanted to know what would be the best Casino to stay at.

When you actually have a unique life with interesting stuff going on in it, you won’t need to make up fake stories or pretend to be a certain type of guy. You will actually be doing the stuff that you talk about and with real confidence. You’ll be the true masculine man that women adore and find attractive.

The next time you and your buddies go out to bash women on the head and drag them back to the cave, you can put your clubs down and follow these tips instead.

  • When talking speak in a calm, clear voice that is loud enough to be heard, especially if you’re in a bar where you have to speak over loud music, other conversations, etc. Speak from your diaphragm, not your chest. You will speak louder and deeper.
  • Don’t be like every other boring guy that tries to talk to her in the bar by asking a bunch of common questions as if it’s an interview. You won’t stand out as different, and she will automatically assume that you’re no different. Ask open ended questions that require her to give an explanation instead of just a yes or no answer.
  • Never take yourself or anything she says as a big deal. It’s okay to have an opinion about something or not agree with everything she says. This shows that you’re not trying too hard to impress her. If you do try too hard to impress her, you’ll be viewed as a weak man. You can stand your ground while being nice and without being a jerk. Be the fun guy everybody respects and wants to be around.
  • Teasing a woman and keeping her on her toes not only shows that you’re fun and flirty but also makes her feel more comfortable around you. Just make sure that you’re teasing rather than insulting – or you might be the one that gets bashed on the head with a club.

Stick with practicing all of these tips and in no time you will go from being a CaveMan to a real man before you realize it. Of course it won’t be easy and will be a lot of work – but anything that’s worth doing never comes easy in life. There will be times when it seems like you’re not making improvements or the obstacles are too big to overcome, but don’t give up. Keep working on improving yourself on a daily basis and eventually you will not only conquer these once seemingly impossible tasks but also move on to overcome even bigger ones. You’re a man, so don’t pretend to be one, actually be one.

Why Men Are Little Boys


Many women complain about not understanding men and always ask why they act the way they do. The answer is simple and I’ll sum it up for you. Inside each man is a frightened little boy who’d love to come out and get a little attention. Picture a little boy in a classroom sitting in a corner while the other students are running around freely, playing and having a good time. He won’t leave the corner because he knows if he does the teacher might catch him and he will be in even more trouble than he already is.

Of course these men aren’t little boys anymore and they no longer have teachers to be afraid of. These men have an even greater fear now, something they deeply desire but at the same time scares them so much they shiver in their boots, almost causing them to pee their pants. You may be asking how these men can desire something that scares them so badly and what could it be? The answer would be, WOMEN.

Just the sight of a woman is enough to make the toughest, bravest, most masculine man lose all concentration, break out in a massive sweat and even make his heart skip a beat. Physically most men could squash a woman with a pinky finger, but when an attractive woman comes within talking distance, a man runs in the opposite direction faster than a Cheetah pounces on it’s prey. He’d rather walk on hot coals or fight a grizzly bear instead of striking up a conversation with her.

This is something that many women know, but no matter how hard they try, can’t figure out why most men are petrified of them. I have a little secret for you, as long as you promise not to tell anybody. Men were actually little boys at one time and they weren’t always afraid of women. Then again, these women weren’t always full grown and were also little themselves.

Way before puberty, little boys and girls would sit together in the school cafeteria eating their lunches out of their fancy lunch boxes, playing games while talking and laughing with each other. Little boys weren’t afraid to talk to little girls because there was no sexual attraction to cause any unnecessary stress or fear. And little girls weren’t afraid to start a conversation with little boys because they didn’t have to worry about being called easy or a slut.

I wish I could tell you that was the end of the story and that little boys and girls lived happily ever after together in peaceful harmony, but that would be a super big lie and an even bigger disappointment. Dating actually is chaotic and sometimes just extremely destructive to not only our mental health but also our physical health. It can cause us to have nervous breakdowns or eating disorders that lead to junk food binges in an attempt to ease the pain of a difficult break-up. So why do we put ourselves through it, then? It’s because if we don’t, we feel lonely and empty inside from not having someone to share our successes and failures with in life, and of course eventually growing old with, a time when nobody else might want us anymore.

As soon as little boys grew up and started to feel an attraction for women, this peaceful harmony got all messed up. Talking to women wasn’t quite so innocent anymore because now there was sexual tension involved, and if he got turned down, he had something to lose: his pride. Being turned down by a woman in front of friends and by-standers can not only destroy a man’s ego and pride, but also his confidence. Once this happens, you start to see desperation oozing out of his pores, even.

Maybe men are traumatized from when they were little boys and heard little girls commenting on how icky and gross boys were. Or could it be from being told by their dads not to be a sissy or little girl, and to toughen up? Many men are told while growing up to not cry or be sensitive or else they will be branded as a wimp for life. That’s a pretty harsh label to live with. Men feel that if they talk about their feelings openly, other men will see them as weak and pick on them ferociously. This is a major issue as to why men don’t share their deep inner feelings with women when asked to. Women on the other hand love to share their feelings with other women and get their opinions. This is one huge difference that exists between men and women.

Instead of letting all these built up feelings out, men instead let them build up inside. Over time, they simmer until there’s no more room to hold them inside – and then all hell breaks loose. These built-up feelings will show themselves in different ways ranging from playing sports aggressively to reckless behavior such as bungee-jumping or mountain-climbing. Some men will even get violent and beat their wives or girlfriends up…but this is mostly a problem for the mentally disturbed, and if you ever meet a man like this you should do yourself a favor and run away as fast as you can. Under no circumstances should you date him.

The largest majority of men will instead pout and throw a tantrum. Some may even stomp their feet and yell just like a little boy crying to his mommy. What he’s really saying is that I didn’t get my own way and I won’t stop until I get my own way. Men don’t mean any harm when they do this and it doesn’t make them bad men. They just haven’t had as much practice as women when it comes to socializing, and when faced with stress they don’t know how to express themselves in any other way except as, A LITTLE BOY. You have two choices here when it comes to dealing with a man who acts like a little boy. Put a diaper on him, give him a baby bottle and rock him to sleep or give him a big hug and tell him everything is going to be alright.

And if worse comes to worse you can always take a dream vacation together and act like kids together, bringing out the little boy and girl that exists within each and every one of us. So happy dating…and every once in awhile let the kids out to play, because after all, kids need to have fun too.

Macho Men Versus Women: The Epic Dating Battle


Hey ladies. Come closer. Closer. Now look over there. You see that sexy beast of a man over there? That’s known as a Macho Man. He’s unlike any other type of man you’ve ever known before. Alpha Male? Child’s play. Cave Man? No comparison. Nice guy? Don’t make me laugh. How dare you or anybody else even attempt to compare a fine specimen of a man like this to those other inferior men. A Macho Man is a completely different kind of beast altogether. He’s a very special beast. The sexiest of all men. Man of all men. Definitely the King of all men.

His clothes are worn out, bad fitting, and lack color and style?

Macho Men don’t bother wearing fashionable clothes that are clean and neat. This is how a Macho Man stands out in a crowd and distinguishes himself from other men. While Pick-Up-Artists “Peacock” to draw a women’s attention, the Macho Man does it by wearing colorless, dull clothing that fits like a garbage bag. Look at those scuffed up work boots with the shoes laces untied. After all, shoes are the first thing a woman notices when a guy walks into a room. And if that isn’t enough to make you drool, just look at that sexy scruffy beard, never mind the tobacco stains. I bet he doesn’t even wear cologne or deodorant. A man like this most likely hasn’t taken a bath in weeks, leaving his true sexy man smells for ladies like you to enjoy. No wonder you haven’t noticed the Alpha Male or Cave Man.

Why is he so loud, obnoxious, and rude, and calls women names?

This is how Macho Men attract the opposite sex. It’s part of their game plan. Unlike other men, the Macho Man doesn’t have to approach women. Instead he just sits there with the few acquaintances he does know and talks loud enough to make even a deaf man get a headache. This way everybody has no choice but to notice him, even in noisy bars. He’s definitely the leader among men, and we all know how much women love leaders. Every other man in the place is envious of this dominant super being. That’s why nobody even bothers talking to him. Besides he’s too skilled to be bothered with outdated social skills.

The Macho Man doesn’t buy women drinks either. He’s too smart for that. Instead he sits there, grasping his beer tightly, as if someone is trying to steal it. Maybe he’s onto something. We do know that a lot of women use men to just buy drinks all night and then ditch them when they get bored.

But I doubt that any woman will get bored with this super sexy Macho Man, because he has another trick up his sleeve. Mr Greatness doesn’t use Negs like a Pick-Up Artist does. He brings it to a whole new level. By calling women filthy names he’s not only showing he’s not desperate by any means, he’s also lowering her value and increasing his. In fact, he lowers her value so much that over time she experiences great periods of depression and low self worth, followed by therapy. There’s no way any woman would even consider leaving such a great, dominate man. He’s the ultimate challenge, and women crave a challenge. Let’s see you compete with that, Pick-Up Artists.

How do you avoid being scarred by these divorced, destined-to-be-single losers for life?

The answer is simple. Just look for the following signs mentioned above. Many Macho Men are either divorced or about to be divorced due to the fact that after years of abuse, their wives get fed up with them. These inferior men have no clue about how to truly love a woman and treat her right.

Instead of showing her love and respect, he controls her life and calls her untrue filthy names. Instead of helping her raise the kids, he sits around all day drinking beer and watching television. This bum has no idea what a job is. He probably can’t even spell it, seeing as he hardly has any education. You’re looking at a true lazy slacker who doesn’t strive to better himself but instead just strives to get by – barely. The kids grow up watching this – leaving the daughter to have mental issues and dating the same kind of guys her father was, and the son growing up to be the same abusive alcoholic or a confused loner.

Of course the mother ends up scarred for life, never allowing another man to fully enter her life again, thereby being cheated out of the true love that she deserves. And don’t forget the stress she endures working two jobs to support her children because the lazy Macho Man doesn’t even have the decency to pay child support. He’d rather quit his job first.

No man should ever put a woman down, especially his wife. If a woman truly isn’t any good, then why would any man want to date her? Why wouldn’t he just divorce her if she did end up being different than what he thought she was when he married her? It says alot about such a man. Obviously he’s desperate or he wouldn’t be with her.

When a man and women first meet, it might start out as a physical attraction, but if theres no mental connection, the new romance between them isn’t going to last long. Women like to know that a guy isn’t with them just because of their physical beauty, but also for the great qualities she possesses inside. She wants to know that he truly loves her because they have things in common, plus some unique qualities about her that aren’t the same as his so that they can both learn from each other.

While it’s true that both men and women should always strive to improve themselves on a daily basis, the fact is that men are the ones who have to approach women and ask them out. That’s why it’s important that men make the extra effort to improve their confidence, social skills and learn how to truly treat a woman right. It’s important that you guys read as many dating, social and confidence building books as possible on a daily basis. And if you truly feel like you have some inner demons that you can’t defeat on your own, seek out the proper mental help immediately in order to get better and form a healthy attitude towards women. Good luck, and keep me posted on your success.